Dotty Scott (DS): Hello, everybody, and welcome to Hello Hump Day. And I hope that you are halfway to your goal for the week. Today we are interviewing Miss Trish Carr the fabulous Trish Carr, and I’m going to go ahead and read her bio.
She is an acclaimed sales expert for over three plus decades. Trish combines proven sales strategies with the latest behavioral science resulting in a simple formula that gets past the pitfalls associated with selling. Man, we would all love to get past those pitfalls.
She is a number one best selling author, business mentor, and award winning international speaker sent her early years she has worked to be the change by stepping up, speaking out, and leading the way on women’s equality and human rights. She is the co-founder of Women’s Prosperity Network, a global movement of women coming together in collaboration to be a massive force for positive change through our projects, our products and our services. Welcome Trish.
Trish Carr (TC): Thank you. I’m so excited to be here. I love talking about this subject.
DS: Yes. So I have known you for almost a year now. Maybe a little over a year. Yeah. And I have always wondered, I’m assuming you did not start where you are right now. No. And I’m curious, how did you start? Like, what was your journey of how you decided to even become self employed?
TC: Well, that’s a wonderful question. Let me tell you, I worked clerical jobs when I was younger, right out of school. And when I moved from New York to Florida, I wanted to get a job where I could be secure. And I did, I landed the job of a lifetime, I got a job at the phone company. And people who work for the phone company, just like people who work for the government. You don’t need to get another job, you can move within that organization, you can transfer to other states, it was the perfect, great job. So that’s why it was the job of a lifetime. It was it was the job I wanted, I wanted to be able to have a corporate job that gave me opportunity for mobility. And that’s what it did for me.
And I really, you know, I don’t know whether it was luck or preparation or the the intersection of those two things. But I moved up the corporate ladder every couple of years, I changed job titles and job positions. So I never got bored doing what I was doing.
DS: You probably built your skill sets doing that too.
TC: Absolutely. Absolutely. I was so lucky that I was a natural leader as people say. Now, you may say I’m a natural leader, I might call myself controlling, and I have to be in charge of everything, right.
I think that’s the way my husband looks at it anyway. But I knew I wasn’t going to be somebody who took orders all the time. I was made to create the orders, you know, so I moved up. And actually what I did was, I became a union representative.
DS: Oh, really?
TS: Yes. I was always selected for some leadership role within the company, you know, “Lead this group,” or “Lead this initiative.” But I wanted to really facilitate change. As you mentioned in my bio, I’m somebody who is a change maker. My sister calls me a rebel. And in fact, my moniker is the the Results Revolutionary because I’m all about changing it up and shaking things up. So I wanted to effect change. And I decided that the union was the right way to go. So I actually became a vice president of the Union. I was well respected within the union. I was well respected by the company because it was the company in the Union.
TC: And honestly, at some point, I realized that if I wanted to affect real change, doing it from the outside in was not the most effective approach — that I had to be in the inside to effect the change I wanted to see; and it’s so funny because when I told my boss I said, “Can we talk about some management positions?” He was like, “I’m so glad you said that. I’ve been waiting for you to tell me that. You have such great leadership skills, you’re just a little skewed in your thinking. Like we need to make you think like a company person.” So luckily, you know, they were like open arms, “Come on Trish, we want you to lead.”
But what happened in the 90’s? So I was with this company for about 15 years, and what happened in the 1990’s, was there was a massive downsizing in all corporations. And the way that At&T, which was the company that I worked for. The way that they had to do their layoffs was very sad, because unfortunately, many people do not like conflict. Because people don’t like conflict, many managers simply rated people as satisfactory or above satisfactory. So they couldn’t look at results and say, “Oh, well, you’re in the bottom. So you have to go.” Because everybody looked good.
So they created a rating system that really created terrible results, and people were laid off. I was very lucky. I was rated in the top tier, of course. I knew I would. I had lots of mentors, but lots of people were laid off, and it was very sad, because people who thought they were doing great jobs all this time, finally find out that, “Well, you’re not really pulling your weight. I know you’ve been here 15 years, but sorry, you’re the one that has to go.” So not only did people have to leave, but they had to leave with the worst feeling, you know, “Oh my gosh, I’m a piece of junk, who knew?”
I didn’t want to stay around the environment that was left. What was left were people covering up, trying to hold their jobs, everybody being political. Most of my mentors – the people who respected me – the people who moved me up. were gone, and I didn’t like what was happening.
I was not seen as a big fish anymore. Truthfully, I mean, I became just a number, and when they move people around in jobs, they just looked at what I did before and they put me where they thought I wanted to go, and it wasn’t. So I left.
DS: It was no longer a good fit, and no longer the perfect job.
TC: No, it wasn’t, it became quite the opposite. So when I left – and this happens for so many people, you know – you have this job where you’re getting a paycheck every week, and you’re secure. Now luckily for me, I was in sales, so I knew how to sell, I knew how to influence. I was also someone who was on the stage all the time with a microphone. So I really developed my skills of influence, and everything that I’ve done since I absolutely owe to that career, no question. But there I was, in the mid-90’s, not sure what I wanted to do, so I tried a bunch of different things.
And I think that’s one of the things most of us don’t do enough of. My husband had a job, so money was coming in. They also gave me what was called at the time a golden parachute, like, “Here leave, and here’s some money.” So they gave me lots of money to leave — they even paid my my health insurance for three years after I left.
TC: I know. So they really made it easy for me to get out of there.
DS: You know I read about that happening these days?
TC: No, not anymore. Not anymore. But then it was, it was pretty much the norm if you were a high level manager, and I was at that point, a high level manage –, they gave us a nice amount of money to go. And I read a book. I didn’t know what I wanted to do, but I read a book and it was called, You Can Do Anything You Want: If You Only Knew What it Was.
DS: That’s a great title.
TC: It’s a great title, and it was a great book. And what she (the author) recommended was — and this is advice for everybody — even if you’re working, dabble in the things you think you want to do if you want to break out on your own. So I did radio commercials. I had friends who were in radio, so I was able to do radio commercials. I thought I wanted to do voiceover acting.
I love animals, so I wanted to work with animals, so I volunteered at a shelter, and found I didn’t want to work with animals because I don’t want to clean out cages. I don’t want to deal with barking dogs. I love them, but I don’t want to take care of them like that. I volunteered at the museum because I love history. I just did all the things I loved, and I lucked out. I really lucked out — I am surrounded by people, and I think that the biggest thing that I can suggest to anyone who wants to do their own thing, start their own business, be a single shingle — as my friend Charlie calls it — is to be surrounded by people who support you, know you, love you care about you, and understand you. People who are going to say, “You go girl! You can do this girl!” Not people who are going to see you fall and say, “Oh, maybe you should go back and get a job again.”
DS: So that may not be family.
TC: Right. A lot of times, it’s not family. A lot of times it’s people who are…you know, you really want to find the people who are doing what you’re doing. And what I did was I trained at corporations. I was a trainer for corporations. I would go in and do all kinds of different types of training, technical training, as well as sales training, as well as what they call soft skills training. It’s now called EQ, or intelligence quotient on how to deal with people, how to manage difficult conversations, how to move people to be productive. So that’s the first thing I did.
But the, the biggest thing is that no matter what, I always had people who had my back and who understood me, and who never said, you should get a job. And what I find is that, like me, when I first started doing my own thing, my friends were my old friends, my friends from my job. My friends who thought that the nirvana is having a paycheck for the rest of your life and working for a company that can tell you to do whatever they want you to do whenever they want you to do it. And they don’t, they don’t get it. It’s not that they don’t love you, it’s simply they don’t understand the thinking it takes to be an entrepreneur — to be on your own — to be responsible for your own income.
DS: So they’ve never been there.
TC: Right. A lot of times anyway, right. You know, there’s that that old story about the crabs in the, in the crab pot, and all the crabs are at the bottom and one of them tries to climb out. And literally the other crabs will jump and pull that crab back down.
TC: And it’s not that they don’t care about you, it’s just that they think they’re doing the best that it is for you. So surrounding yourself with like-minded and more importantly, like-spirited people, is the number one suggestion I have for people.
So I did a lot of different things. I trained at corporate, and then I got sick of that, because I felt like I was doing what I was doing before. Then I got into real estate investing.
DS: Was that fun?
TC: Oh my gosh, I had such a great time. I had a mentor who invited me simply to help him with the leads. So I would go meet the homeowner. I would talk to the homeowner. I would connect them with him, and he would close the deal. And I would get a piece of that. Like I would get paid just for bringing him in. Then I get a percentage on whatever the foreclosure, or sometimes if it was a probate, I would get a piece of that. So I again, because of the people in my life, because I was surrounded by people, because I know relationships are e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g, I had people that I could go to, who offered me positions. You know, first thing is you have to shine. You have to be somebody who shows up. You have to be somebody who is there to serve other people. And they will think of you first when it’s time. So I was invited to do that. And it was fun, fun, fun until the bubble burst back in 2008. In 2008 we all went into a recession you remember right?
DS: Yes, I do remember.
TC: You also were unhappy in your job? When was that that you left your job?
DS: You know I couldn’t tell you what year it was. It was about 17 or 18 years ago or so.
TC: That was the beginning of the 2000’s.
DS: Yeah. So, you know, it was time for me. My daughter was just getting into first grade, and I knew she was going to be one of these sports, extra curricular activity kind of gals.
DS: And I wanted to be able to attend everything without asking permission. That was one big driving point.
TC: Yeah, but it’s scary, isn’t it? Like when you give up that paycheck that you’re getting every week?
DS: Oh, yes. Yes. It’s very scary. When I did my big leap, I did have another person who was paying the bills. And about three months after I quit my job, and went 100% self- employed, it was with the idea of having extra money for vacations, and for our retirements and that kind of thing. Well, he lost his job. And never did really get another paying-the-bills kind of job, so I had to quickly pivot. That’s a big word these days.
DS: Quickly pivot into being the person that paid all the bills. So it was a big leap of faith and very scary.
TC: Yeah, I know the feeling. I got divorced during this time that I was spreading my entrepreneurial wings. So same thing for me. It was a little scary because even though his income was not anywhere near what mine was when I was in corporate, it was still steady money.
TC: But I got divorced because it was the right thing for me. I made the choice. I knew that that was something that I had to do. And that was part of the impetus of our creating the Women’s Prosperity Network in 2008.
TS: Because, yes. Because in 2008, when the recession hit, many people that I knew that were in jobs, were no longer in jobs. Just like now with the pandemic and what happened to people — they got laid off. And I saw so many women who wanted to do something on their own, like the hairdresser who wants to start her own business knows a lot about cutting hair, but doesn’t have a clue how to run a business. Right?
DS: Oh, yeah.
TS: There are two different skill sets. Even I, when I came out of corporate — even though I han my organization as a profit and loss center. So I watched numbers, I paid attention: I looked at the data. I was projecting and forecasting and doing all those things that you do in business. I didn’t have all the skills to be a business person, either. But there were a lot of women around me, who wanted to do different things. And I also had friends who were burnt out in their jobs: Nurses in particular, burnt out in their jobs, and in corporate, burnt out. But the first thing they thought of was let me go get another job. So it’s like, “No, you don’t have to do that.” The other issue that I ran into about my divorce was I had money in the bank. I knew how to earn money. Worst case, I could get a job because I had networked enough. But how many women did I know at that time I was in my mid 40s? And how many women I knew who did not have my choice, but they had to stay in an unhappy marriages. They had to stay feeling less than. They had to stay.
DS: They were trapped.
TC: Exactly. So there were two things going on. So what happened was I didn’t like going networking. I really didn’t. It had such a yucky feeling for me. I’m not shy.
DS: I was gonna say and you’re great with people.
TC: Thank you. I could walk into a room, and I could meet people, and I could make friends, but I didn’t like it. I didn’t like when I said to someone, “Hi, I’m Trish Carr!” and I put my hand out. I said, “And you are?” and instead of speaking to me, they would take their business card and hand me their business card. I’m like, “Why don’t you talk to me?”
DS: I hate that.
TC: Me too. And I would walk into a room and there would be little group of four over here, and a little group of three over here. And and I said you know, “If this is a challenge for me, what’s it like for every other woman who doesn’t even have nearly the confidence that I have?” Right?
TC: I want to know those cliques
DS: It was really hard when I was trying to do it.
TC: Yeah, it’s like, how do you weasel your way in without feeling pushy, right? That’s the last thing we want to feel. And then the other thing was the way I saw people selling — it was a very male energy. You know. I felt like everybody I talked to, they all wanted to be an infomercial.
I wanted to create a network that was comfortable, that felt good, that was warm, that was inviting. And I wanted to show other women, in particular, because that’s really my work my whole life: I’ve been moving the needle forward for women’s equality. I wanted to show women that you can have a business. You can take what you love doing, and turn it into your income. I also wanted the women who were stuck in relationships to have options. So it was all of that coming together, and lucky for me, I have two amazing sisters – blood sisters – who also wanted to do that with me, so we teamed together to create it, and I have to tell you that having partners makes things a lot easier. You know, you can share the work, you can share the challenges, you can share the joy…
DS: …and the skill sets.
TC: Absolutely. And we all bring great skills to the table and we fill in each other where you know, where I don’t have something – my sister Susan Winter will have it. If Susan doesn’t have it, my sister Nancy Matthews will have it. So I really think creating relationships and partnering with people is a great way to create something. And here’s the thing: It doesn’t have to be your sister. It could be a friend, it could be someone you admire, someone you know, someone you know who will be there for you. And you can always find common ground to create whatever it is you want to create. So that’s kind of how it all happened. In a 20 minute nutshell.
DS: A couple of things came to mind as you were talking, and I’ll bring up the last one that came to mind. First, you were talking about partnering up with people. And I know in the past, when I personally tried to partner up with somebody just on one little project, not something big, like a business, things would fall apart very quickly. And for me, it was generally maybe the expectations weren’t clearly laid out or something. So what advice do you have along the lines of actually making a partnership work, or even choosing the right type of person to partner with in the beginning? You know what I mean?
TC: Yes, absolutely. I know exactly what you mean. There’s a lot of things to do. You are right expectations is the biggest thing. Most of the time we go into it, we’re very excited about it. Everybody’s on board, and then we hit a hiccup. So the thing is, you’ve got to have in writing, who’s doing what, who’s responsible for what, right down to the generation of revenue. Because if one person is doing all the revenue generation, the others are going to feel bad that they’re not doing it. And the person who’s doing the revenue generation is going to be resentful of them because they’re not doing it. So it’s really about setting like you said, Dotty. You’re right: it’s about getting the expectations of who’s doing what? What are you responsible for? What’s your accountability? Right? Are we gonna get together every Monday, Wednesday and Friday and check in with each other about what’s happening, what’s what’s going on? How are we doing? What can I do better?
And then the, the intangible, but it is very tangible, is that we like to say we have a 10 relationship. So on a scale of one to 10, our relationship is a 10. Individually and together. And what that means is that if we have a conflict, we handle it right then and there. We speak our mind with tact and love. We don’t make up stories about what we think somebody might be doing or not doing. We ask and we communicate. And I know that communication is the answer to everything. But some people don’t even get what communication is. Communication is you see something, you say something. Not you see something, you think about it, you wonder, you get more excited about it. And then finally, when you talk about it, you’re exploding. That’s not what it is. And how you handle those things are also agreements that you have in the beginning.
DS: So you have that all written out.
TC: Yes, as much as you can. Even you know, at Women’s Prosperity Network. When we first started, we wanted to create networking and masterminding in a way for women to share best practices for networking, but we have grown into a full fledged education, mentoring. We have all of the tools that you need to be successful in business. And if we we personally don’t, we have we have a network of people that we can refer you to, like you, Dotty, who can do a bang up job on your SEO, your websites, and making sure that everything’s working. And that’s really key, is that you have really great partners, not just who you work with, and you have agreements with, but partners that make other differences that you can’t make
TC: Strategic partners
TC: Correct. And that also helped us grow. But you know, the thing is that no matter where you are, if you’re thinking you want to start your business, or you’re in a business, and you want to know how to make it grow, I invite you to connect with Women’s Prosperity, because that’s what we’re about. We show you how to create partnerships, how to create strategic partnerships, for small projects and big projects. How to create affiliates, people who love what you do so much that they’re singing your praises and helping you fill your client list.
DS: Yes. I am very happy that I joined Women’s Prosperity Network. It’s been a great year and a half. As far as growing my business and whenever I’ve got a question, you guys seem to have the answer.
TC: Well, and I don’t have to know all the answers because I can find somebody who does. And that’s key, you don’t have to have all the answers. And that’s something that holds us back from starting our own businesses. We feel like, well, “What are people going to learn from me?” Remember that a five year old can teach a three year old how to tie their shoes, you don’t have to know everything, you just have to know a little bit more than the people in front of the people that you’re you’re working with. So starting your business is about trying trial and error. And the more mistakes you make, the better you get, because you learn on every mistake. And one of the biggest things is to really expand your, what we call your, your network – the people that you know – your connections, your resources. And that happens by networking. And networking happens in a lot of ways. When you go to a workshop, you’re networking with the people there. When you are out in the grocery store, you can meet people. I mean, there’s places that you can go. And then there’s really traditional networking. So one of the things we do especially now in this age of virtual networking, where people are doing it on Zoom, on other platforms…there’s really a nuance to being able to effectively network. So I actually have a gift for everybody on how to network and maximize your virtual connections. Because connections are everything. So you can go to www.womensprosperitynetwork.com/virtual. And there you’ll see how do you maximize your virtual networking becausen you want to be with the right people. And you’re not always going to make it the first time. Like we’ve worked with partners that we thought were the right partners, and it didn’t work out. But we learned along the way.
DS: I can attest to that too.
TC: Right? Haven’t you? We’ve had people where it fell apart. “Okay, it fell apart. What can we do differently next time?”
DS: Yep, it’s all a learning curve. So I will put that link in the comments under the live video after we’re done here.
DS: And I just wanted to affirm what you were saying about you don’t have to know everything. When I first started my business. I actually started before social media was a big thing. It was back when MySpace was out there, so a long time ago. And, I was one of these people, “Social media. What’s that? Why do I have to it?” blah, blah, blah. like I hear people saying now. My thought was, “If I’m two weeks ahead of the person I’m teaching, I’m golden.”
TC: Yep. That’s exactly right.
DS: And that’s what I did. I stayed, I learned. And I did little trainings on how to do something, and create a following from people that were two weeks behind where I was.
TC: Yeah, that’s all you need to do.
DS: Well this has been a fabulous conversation. Thank you so much.
TC: Thank you so much,
DS: Many pearls of wisdom in there. And for next week, we will be visiting with Terri Lynn Phillips. Oh, that will be super exciting as well.
TC: I just saw her.
DS: Yep. I hope all of you guys are again halfway to your weekly goal. So we can celebrate Hello, Hump Day next Wednesday as well. And have a fabulous day. Bye. Thank you.
TC: Bye, everybody.